| done |
[15 Mar 2004|02:24am] |
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im done im sorry i cant change what happend if i could id go back to the night i told steph i liked her and nver opend my mouth not olny to solve my oun discomfort but to end all the pain im causing every one els. i am an inconsiterat asshole im not worth her love anyways i try but it never works i need to be alown thats what im good at. i m not sure what ill do in the future to sole my problum but my list of soulutions is geting smaller and smaller and theres that bid one thats at the end and its just calling to me. this is the last post ill be making. i just want to emphasise that im sorry for all the greff and turmoil iv cause i wount be a part of ur lives anymore to solve that. im going back to the way i was before ivan knows that person i wish i wasnt but i can feel the change already. goobye i hope i can stand up agen but the way things are goin ill just make it to sitting. im laying now. i whish to sleep and not awaken to ease the pain i have given and taken.
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| late night talks |
[10 Mar 2004|07:52pm] |
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i love the late night talks i have with steph we had another one last night for like 3 or 4 hours about what we expect and all the god stuff and sum of the bad but iv never really talked or connected like this to any of my other gf's. its a really good thing and i allways feel really good after we talk. its like being completly open with each other just lifts all the doubts and worry off of me. i just can explan it. it makes me feel more comfertable in that i know i can be who i am and not worry about being put down by the one person i care most about. im in love with you steph.
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| hehehe |
[10 Mar 2004|04:31am] |
i found this on one of my late night studys. LAUGHF DAMN YOU, YOU KNOW ITS FUNNY!!!!
HOW TO KNOW WHEN YOU'VE DONE TOO MUCH DXM
by William White
I always try to keep a sense of humor in life ... after all, it's only a
temporary stop between incarnations anyhow. In view of that, I offer
some suggestions from readers on how to know when to stop.
- You can identify a dozen different brands of cough syrup ... by the
smell alone
- The local pharmacist starts asking about your tuberculosis problem
- The checkout clerk calls you "that Robitussin junkie"
- When you take out your recycling it's all brown glass bottles
- You ran out of excuses at the supermarket and now just tell people
you like that cherry taste
- If Drixoral Dollars were real you'd own a Ferrari
- You haven't slept in two weeks, haven't eaten solid food in days, and
you've just told your parents that you're marrying an alien from the
desert planet Zolgar
- You've gotten so used to your eyes moving independently that you
think you're actually a cleverly disguised lizard
- You just made your fifth Christmas ornament out of those little
plastic shotglasses
- People ask you why you're walking around in shorts and a T-shirt
sweating like a horse ... in the dead of winter.
- Your native language now consists of grunts and bizarre gestures
- Sophia Loren, Sean Connery, etc., come knocking at your door offering
a night of passion and you tell them you aren't into "meat pleasures"
- You think you're on the Internet ... physically.
- You're sure you're actually a Jedi Master, but for some reason your Jedi
Mind Powers don't seem to work on the cop that just arrested you for
walking naked down Main Street.
On a more serious note, if you do start finding reality breaking down,
your friends avoiding you, or your grades or work performance dropping,
it's time to stop. DXM may be a lot of fun, but it just isn't worth
losing something truly important over.
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| poop |
[08 Mar 2004|11:39pm] |
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ok so theres all this poop and its not even my poop but i hafta deal with it any ways so ok now enough about the poop lets discuse the anti-poop ok so steph is like the bestest in the world and i love the woman to death and she makes all the poop go away i cant get over how much iv grown to care and love her soo quickly i think thats why we have desited to take it slow at first its safer that way. i know nothing bad will come of me and steph and if u quetion it ill poop in ur mouth ok so step off. heheheh i loves you babes.
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| ok ok ok |
[03 Mar 2004|12:54pm] |
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so all this poopy poop stuff has been going on between kat and ivan and i love them both dearly but it seem that if they dont pull the cord on hte parashoot "IE get over it and do what ever needs to be done to stay together" then there DOOMED to splat into the earths crust like just another pigeion dropping "IE breack up and be lonly and moppy and completatly depreste and the list gos on". ok ok ok i know its really not any of my besnus and i sould probably just stay out of it but i just think of all the fun stuff we"IE me steph ivan and kat" could do together and have fun in the future. besides i dont want to see any of my freinds become another pigey poopy. i love u all. envy me.
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| cori |
[01 Mar 2004|02:00am] |
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ok so iv never really done that many drugs in my life but it seems now that im older and depressed most of the time "besides when im with steph" so it seem only fare to give drugs a chance "now i know what ur gonna say illigle illigle, but purple sticky punch" nrvm that little tangent. so i triped on cori and spent the night with steph ivan and kat. i would have to say on a scale of 1 to 10 that that night was like an umm .....hmmm allot more than 10. so i can only imagen what itll be like when we all roll together. woot. im looking foward to doin more fun stuff with steph because i love her and i feel safe when im with her so havin a bad trip is not gona happen as long as im with her other wise i mite be like seenin people coverd in after birth and bees stingin me and pink flamingos dead all over the ground. not good. but as long as im with my babes it will be just fine. so i guess thats it. but i am still afread ima get addicted because after the cori wor off all i wanted to do was sum more so i would keep feelin it, but i guess we all gotta come down sum time right! right!?!?.....um...right. ok so good night or morning nrvm ill talk to yous later. i loves yous babes.
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| exitment |
[27 Feb 2004|05:54pm] |
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i am exited about tomaro so woooooooooooooooooot. i hope it all works out wev been tryin to get it to work for like 3 weeks so finaly it will woot just woot. i think we will all have a good time. and then in a week or 2 if ivan gets his munyes then we can "ROX" tripple X core, roswell still....um exuse that im just really siked about it. i cant wate to wake up in the morning and the first thing i see will be the person i love. arrrrrrrr i just cant wate. but all good things are worth wating for.
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| party people |
[26 Feb 2004|11:14pm] |
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iv never really benn a party person i mean iv been to a few partys with friends but it just seems that the more people i am around the more "alone" i feel. just being with one person at a time and know u have there undivided attention is best. so its no surprise that i try to avoid situation that include large groups of people. the perfect idea of a party in my mind "witch i dont recommend long stays in" is just me and steph and ivan and kat all together just the 4 of us doing what we do best nothing more nothing less. its perfect. iv always been an introvert. sticking to his close group of friends. but the truth is that i like it that way and i hate it when people give me crap about it. like i fucking care what they think in the first place if there not my friends they shouldn't be talking to me anyways. but woot for the friends i do have and the people i love. they are the thread that keep my tattered and torn body together. with out them i would have been long gone long ago. i love u all especially steph though because she is the nettle that sews the thread.
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| chillin |
[25 Feb 2004|02:42pm] |
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so after being alon for so long i finally have sum one to tell them i love them its seems new and fresh like its the first time. i love being in love but i make sure im not just in love with love but that im actually in love with the person, which in this case i know i am. shes so great that all the shit is cleared away i cant wate to see what developes from this. im just giddy all the time and the felling in side has returned from what ever sort of slumber. i almost gave up on its return. my hope is a new born child.
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| woot |
[23 Feb 2004|06:11pm] |
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weeee ima start a live journal woot
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